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Greetings!

After 44 – I repeat – forty-four years of being single, two years ago (on April 21st), I got married.

I haven’t shared much about my marriage with you in these two years because it has been a time of learning, growing and deep introspection.

I have a mind that needs to deeply understand things so it has taken me some time to study and understand the power of marriage. This was new and it took some time for me to get my balance.

As I sat in my quiet time on the eve of our two-year anniversary, I took some time to think about all I have learned. I was surprised by what I wrote and I want to share it with you.

I pray that it is a blessing to you – whether you are single or married. Enjoy!

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I am beginning to understand this thing called marriage.

I am beginning to understand why Jesus used the relationship of marriage to highlight the sheer force of His love for us and why He compared His love of the Church to how a man should love his wife.

I am beginning to understand that marriage is about keeping your heart purified on a daily basis so no veils of hurt or resentment remain. Those veils can easily turn into walls of distance in only days.

I am beginning to understand that marriage is about dying to self so the other person can live. Only then can they die to self on your behalf so true love – agape love – can flow.

I am beginning to understand losing the boundaries of who I am because they flow so seamlessly and comfortably into who my spouse is.

I am beginning to understand that there is no such thing as “My” in marriage. My money. My time. My love. My heart. My vision. It is not until you give up the “My” that your true self has space to come out and get all that it needs.

I am beginning to understand that it is not just about sacrifice and compromise. It is much deeper than that. It is about honor and truly seeing who someone is, not who their past hurt, pain and rejection says they are. When you honor your spouse, they will honor you.

I am beginning to understand that you are precious gifts to one another that need to be loved, appreciated and cherished on a daily basis. Marriage is the gift that keeps on giving if you know how to unwrap it without messing up the gift or the paper in which is it wrapped.

I am beginning to understand that there is something much more valuable than financial security – emotional security; and that there is no place for personal insecurity in a marriage.

I am beginning to understand that wives are King-makers. We must be spiritually, emotionally and mentally mature if we desire a King and not a boy. If you want a King, you must operate as a Queen. If you are in your girl, it can only create a boy. If you are in your woman, it creates a man. When you’re in your Queen, it yields a King. Only Queenship works in marriage.

I am beginning to understand that there is power in keeping your mouth shut because you no longer have to defend your opinion. In order to become One, you must have one mind. This does not mean that you agree on everything. It means that you fully understand and honor how your spouse sees things and where they are coming from.

It is not about defending the different ways in which you may have been raised. It is about learning new things from each other’s experiences.

Marriage is about Oneness. It is the outward expression of the inward relationship with Jesus. It is the closest expression of what it takes to become One with the Lord and to feel a resemblance of the love Jesus has for us.

I praise God that I am able to experience the power and love He intended us to experience in the marriage union.

I praise the Lord that he brought me a husband that has a heart like Jesus.

I praise God for my husband, Anthony, who has taught me what true love, true union and true Oneness is all about.

Thank you, Lord, for the gift of marriage.

I praise the Lord that he brought me a husband that has a heart like Jesus.

I praise God for my husband, Anthony, who has taught me what true love, true union and true Oneness is all about.

Dedicated to Your Success,
Ericka